The butch can't bake... (and other wittering)

Yeah, I'm calling a two week (from right now, this minute, 23:39 UK time) baking strike.  I have to, I'm on lighter life and the baking makes it very, very hard to stick it out.  Seriously, can you make cookie dough and not try some raw? can you smell fresh bread without wanting to chow down right there and then (and for the love of monkeys pass me the butter!) on its warm, yeasty loveliness?

 Thought not.  Me neither.

 My strike rules (aliens are all about rules)

1. no cookies, no cookie dough, no damn cookies.
2. no cake, no cake batter.
3. no steamed puddings.
4. no flaming brownies, blondies or bars!
5. no crumbles, crisps, slumps or cobblers, not even in the case of a family crisis.
6. no sweet breads, babkas, croissants, scones or coffee cakes.
7. no pancakes, griddle cakes, johnny cakes or welsh cakes.
8. no fun (kidding, kidding, I can still have fun)
9. no pies, no tarts, no crust.
10. nice, normal bread is permitted, but only for other peoples consumption.  I shall be at the other end of the house till the nice smell vamooses.

 This should help me focus a little in any case... and looking on the bright side if I don't lose weight I'll at least save money on unsalted butter and eggs.  Apart from the weight thing the moratorium on baking sweet stuff should allow me to check back in with the bready part of my list which is languishing under a pile of cookie/cake/brownie recipes almost as heavy as me.  Today I made a very lovely bread with red wine and walnuts, but, alas, it doesn't count towards the B2/M2 project as it's from a library book.  I have no pictures either, for shame.

 For entertainments sake lets have a ticker... yes, a nice, ticky, ticker (yep, ocd still here) which represents my goal using pie and cookies.  I also have a wicked sense of irony.

So dear reader (or voice in my head, whatever) there you go, no cake, just bread. But bread is good, bread is better than good, it's bloody great stuff.  I meant to post pics of the challah I made but it was devoured before I got the camera out, see, everyone loves bread (apart from those Atkins folks, but we don't care about them).



Challah back girl

Yeah, I know, just couldn't resist.  I loved making challah, I started out with it (from a totally generic, non artisan inspired, not real sourdough, stoneground  bread making book I bought in a pound shop) as one of the first breads I really made a lot.  Worked every time, looked pretty, tasted great.

 Then I lost my challah mojo, who knows why? maybe it's like the Kirkcubright centipede Check the video out! I over thought the braiding? made the dough too wet, dunno.  Maybe a combination of these factors.  Anyway, does it matter? no! I've joyfully embraced many other breads and techniques, but in my heart I've missed my challah.  Chocolate chip challah, raisin challah, pumpkin challah... *sigh*

 Last night, whilst watching Shrek 2 with one eye and reading The Complete International Jewish Cook Book (1980 edition) by Evelyn Rose I decided to try again, I mean if she cant help me who can?  Her dough was simple and quick to prepare, then required a long, cold rise.  Perfect, I'd been up since four so a bread that didn't mind me going back to bed was ideal.

 I braided the dough using the fabulous video on you tube, see it here.  Absolutely the easiest and clearest instructions to follow.

 The recipe, pictures will be along tomorrow, I mean, it's dark here! really dark.  I love November.

Fresh Yeast Challah

15g fresh yeast (Asda/Sainsburys/Tesco give it away for nearly free, Sainsburys, or free, Tesco, Asda.  Just ask someone on the bakery counter)

200g warm water

2 tsp salt

3 tsp caster sugar  (I used honey)

2 tbsp oil

480g bread flour

1 large egg (plus 1 to glaze)

 poppy seeds or whatever you like to sprinkle on top

Mix the water, yeast, sugar and a third of the flour together on a bowl.  Stir till a smooth, pastey batter forms, then leave it covered for 20 minutes.  It should have frothed up and be bubbly.

 Now add the egg, oil, salt and the rest of the flour.  Knead together until a smooth, springy dough comes together, it should be slightly sticky but not excessively wet.

 Oil a bowl lightly and refrigerate the dough for 12 to 24 hours.

 Remove the dough from the fridge and leave at room temperature for a while, to take off the chill.  Divide the dough into evenly sized pieces and shape as you desire, I did a six strand braid, but you could equally well do two smaller loaves or rolls, whatever!

 Allow to prove for half an hour in the warm kitchen.  Glaze with the beaten egg and top with seeds if you like, then bake at 220 for 15 minutes then reduce the heat to 180 and continue to bake for 35-45 minutes depending on size.

 The book gives many variations on shape and flavour, all using the same basic dough.  Pletzels, bialys, even bagels.

Halloween battenburg take #2

'Cause once just wasn't enough! lol.  Same cake, but better I think, just things I learned from the first time.  Fridge the cake between sticking it together (tightly wrapped in cling film) and applying the marzipan.  Work very clean, use lots and lots of cling film, lol.

 Instead of pumpkins we have poisonous (obviously, they are after all red with white dots, it screams poison dont you know?) toadstools and foil wrapped pumpkin sweets.  Yum, unfortunately.

 

Happy Halloween!

Yay! my favourite holiday.  I was actually invited to (rather than hosting, lol) a Halloween party last night.  Any excuse being a good excuse in my eyes I decided to push the boat out and make Martha Stewarts candy corn sugar cookies.  Push the boat out? yeah, living in the UK and all I usually flip right past recipes involving candy corn (which costs around a whacking $4.50 here)  or a half pound of butterscotch/cinnamon/peanut butter chips/Hershey kisses... all far too pricey for a midweek cookie session. 

Anyhow, these are the cutest damn cookies ever! quite tiny, just a little larger than the candy corn itself, but cute and delicious.  I weighed both the chocolate and vanilla doughs and the (raw) cookies were 7g each.  I was really worried, but they baked up just fine, though I thought I let the vanilla ones go a minute or two too long, next time I'll get them out faster.

 Recipes goes like this...

Makes about 36.


4 tablespoons unsalted butter, very soft
1/2 cup sugar
1 large egg yolk
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup all-purpose flour (spooned and leveled)
About 36 candy corns

Preheat oven to 350/180 degrees. Place butter and sugar in a medium bowl; beat with a wooden spoon until combined. Beat in egg yolk, vanilla, baking powder, and salt. Add flour, and mix until a dough forms.


Scoop out level teaspoons of dough (or weigh each ball then roll), and roll into balls (chill dough briefly if it becomes too soft to handle). Place balls on baking sheets, 2 inches apart.

Bake, rotating sheets halfway through, until edges are firm and cookies are dry to the touch (do not let cookies color), 10 to 12 minutes.

Remove from oven; gently press a candy corn into center of each cookie (surface of cookies may crack slightly). Cool on sheets 1 minute; transfer to a rack to cool completely.
 
For the chocolate cookies use half a cup of flour and add a quarter cup of cocoa powder.